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Uncle Ralph Reads! I know it may be hard for some of you to believe, but your Uncle Ralph can read. On the odd occasion when the Buckhorn runs low, I'll pick up a good book. This time I picked up was all about me. ( Well not me exactly, but people just like me.) Cracker Ingenuity: Tips From the Trailer Park for the Chronically Broke, (St. Martin's Press) by P.T. Elliott & E.M. Lowry is a comprehensive history of some of the great things Trailer Trash and Rednecks have been able to accomplish right here in America. In the first chapter you're tested. The Trailer Ingenuity Test (or T.I.T. for short) test you on your trailer-trashness. When I took the T.I.T., I tested as "Trailer True". A high mark to be sure, but then I always did well with T.I.T.s I happened to be reading it in a public place and ended up getting a lot of stares from the people around me because I couldn't help laughing out loud. With some of the stuff in the book you just couldn't help but say "why didn't I think of that?" Things like how to steal electricity and how to make a Jailhouse Tattoo gun. For some of you I know the Jailhouse Tattoo gun will come in handy and may well make it worth the cost of the book. There is a whole section on vices. Did you know Laughing Gas can be a vice? The same thing for Rabbit Tobacco? Dang! Some people know how to party! For those of you that don't read so good, there are lots of pictures and art work. If you're into racing, (and what decent trailer trash ain't?) there are lots of pictures for you. Everything from lawnmower races to school bus races. The only thing I didn't love about the book is that it never mentioned me. Your 'ol Uncle Ralph, a celebrity in his own mind, was never mentioned once. They did mention www.MissouriTrailerTrash.com and www.Snopes.com but not a word on Uncle Ralph. A minor character flaw to be sure and a sin that can be forgiven, as it never detracts from some fun reading.
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