Free Radio Stations

Sponsors    

Long Distance Telephone Service		Free Hoodia Sample   Click Here
1.64¢  In-State*	2.7¢ State to State
State Wide Telecom   Home and Business *In-State Rates May Vary

Paul Bunyan

Dear Uncle Ralph,

I saw a statue of Paul Bunyan while I was in Michigan last summer.  My question is:  Is Paul Bunyan Real?

Kitty?

Dear Kitty,

Yes, Paul Bunyan is real.  He was a legendary lumber jack from the early 1700's.  He and his giant Ox, Babe, are the reason that the great lakes are like they are. 

Minnesota's 10,000 lakes were created by the footprints of Paul and Abe.   The great lakes were created when Paul and Babe, laid down and rested for a night.   And even the Grand Canyon was created by Paul dragging his Ax handle.

Of course these are all wonderful features we all love and take for granted.   But of course a giant Ox will also leave giant piles of - well, since this is a PG13 site, I can't repeat the word they used back in Paul's time, but today, we call it: Detroit.

Send a Friend This Advice

Tornados Picking On Trailer Parks?

Hey Uncle Ralph its Mike J why is it that tornados always strike trailers and trailer parks.  Its like there picking on them ain't it?   Why ? 

thanks
Mike J
 

Hi Mike,

This takes me back to a good book.

Hezekiah 3: 14-21

 Yeah, though man defieth me and buildeth himself dwellings of precious metals, I will smite them with a mighty wind.    Lest thee be content in thy folly, thy foolishness will be made manifest in detestation.  

 

Conceal not thy women behind dwellings of disgust.  Drink not the wine of solitude and smoke not the weed of fragrance lest his workings shall be in vain and his ass shall be set free.

Well, I think that says it all.

Send a Friend This Advice

Kicked Out of Recovery House

hey uncle ralph,

whats kickin?

So I've been homeless since new years eve and so has my buddy what should we do?   by the way we got booted from a recovery house  for excessive drinking and pot smoking.

shadow

Dear Shadow,

Well, there's a hard lesson to learn!   Now your stuck, out in the cold, no place to go but to the library and a cardboard box.

Had you of just stayed drunk, you'd be fine.  You see, in the world we live in, if you drink yourself stupid, grab a waitress on the butt, punch the dude at the next table over because he looked at you funny and then puke in the parking lot, you're just a lovable drunk ( I should Know!).   But if you smoke a joint, pack your face with Doritos and mellow-out, you'll go to jail as a "criminal" and get kicked out of your happy rehab home.   -Go figure.

So I suggest that you go bust a jewerly store window, load your pockets with all kinds of stuff and wait for the cops to show.  Now you can get a warm bed and three meals a day again.

Send a Friend This Advice

Cool Shot Glasses
 

Uncle Ralph,

Check out these cool shot glasses.  Now I know that water is good for more than just flushin the toilet.

http://www.funmansion.com/html/Ice-Shot-Glasses.html

Boseefus
 

Dear Bo,

Cool stuff!   I tried it and it works great.   Thanks for the tip.

Send a Friend This Advice

Conference Call Services

Click Here for the listing of Free Radio Stations

 

Check out the 411 White Pages services at Long Distance Facts White Pages, 411, Canada 411, Reverse 411, &The Phone Book, Free People Search

This Weeks Joke

Or Is It?

 

WHY CONDOMS COME IN BOXES OF 3, 6 AND 12 A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son.  They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, "What are these, Dad? To which the man matter-of-factly replies, "Those are called condoms, Son. Men use them to have safe sex." "Oh I see," replied the boy pensively.  "Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school." He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and asks, "Why are there 3 in this package?" The dad replies, "Those are for high school boys, ONE for Friday, ONE for Saturday, and ONE for Sunday." "Cool" says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and asks, "Then who are these for?" "Those are for college men," the dad answers, TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday, and TWO for Sunday." "WOW!" exclaimed the boy, "then who uses THESE?" he asks, picking up a 12 pack. With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied, "Those are for married men. ONE for January, ONE for February, ONE for March....."

Some of the Top Funny Pages on the Web

Tell A Friend about this because it's so true!

Sponsor www.ldfacts.com

"Quick Compare" Your Long Distance Telephone Rates Enter the first 6 digits of your phone number    Privacy Notice: The information gathered here is used solely to compare long distance rates in your area and is not saved for any reason.

Read the Archive of Advice

Click Here

Click Here to Download a Free Uncle Ralph Wall Paper for Your Computer

Tell A Friend about this!

         Download Free Firefox Mozilla Start Page

Business Telephone Systems in Southeast Michigan

IDT Long Distance

Order Packet 8 Voip

Notice to Web Masters

Increase Web Site Traffic

Advertisements

Copyright 2009 all rights reserved