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A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see
the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope
propped
up prominently on the center of the bed.
It was Addressed "Dad."
With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with
trembling hands:
Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had
to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and
you. I've been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice -
even with all her piercings, tattoos, and her tight
Motorcycle clothes.
But it's not only the passion, Dad, she's pregnant and Joan
said that we will be very happy. Even though you don't care for her as she
is so much older than I, she already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack
of firewood for the whole winter.
She wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my
dreams too. I'm sure that's exactly what God meant when He said to
'be
fruitful and multiply'. Joan also taught me that marijuana doesn't
really hurt anyone, and we'll be growing it for us and trading it with her
friends for all the crack and ecstasy we might want -- just for fun, you know..
In the meantime, we'll pray every night before bed that science will find a cure
for AIDS so Joan can get better; she sure deserves it!!
Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of
myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know
your grandchildren.
Your son,
John
PS: Dad, NONE of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbor's house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are much worse things in life than my
report card that's in my desk center drawer!
I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home......
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